Get to know me

So this is my adventure blog. But do you really know why I created this blog? Lets talk about it. From a very young age I was disillusioned by life. I had an abusive mother who probably would have killed me if it weren’t for my aunt adopting me. She pushed me to finish high school when I got mixed up in drama. She’s always been the one to push me when I feel my lowest. Later on in life when I got mixed up with a narcissist sociopath I fell into a dark twist of lies and manipulation. After being married for a year and together for five, I was cheated on and thrown away. Here I am, not only had my mother thrown me away, but now this creature I decided to give my life and love too has just done the same thing. My divorce was probably the hardest thing I have been through so far in my life. I am only 25 so thank goodness for that. It was a blow to my ego to have to give up everything and move home, to a place I had tried to get away from for years. I remember the night the truth came out, I was devastated. Falling out of love is a strange thing. I didn’t know who I was or what I was going to do. I just knew that I had to leave, and I left everything behind. What were once friends were now enemies and someone I once loved, I now hated. I had me and my dog and I took a car that didn’t belong to me in the hopes of making it home before I completely did something reckless and regretful. Needless to say I had a lot of help along the way. Eventually the title to the car was sent to me. I stayed away from home for a while. Yes I made some bad decisions. When you get rejected, the first thing you (well at least I) want to do is find someone to comfort you and remind you that you are beautiful. So among drunken nights downtown and friends I don’t even remember, I slowly came to my senses. Here my aunt is again pleading for me to come home because I needed to get my life back on track. I hated it. I hated moving into the same place I had tried to run away from for years. I wanted to be on my own. I wanted to be strong. But sometimes you have to move back like an arrow so you can be launched forward. They say your first heartbreak is the worst. It was. However, it is through the despair that I found my strengths. I know that i’ll be okay on my own because I was okay all these years. I have always found a way to make it through. I thank my mom for not wanting me because she taught me to be strong. I thank my ex for manipulating and lying to me because he taught me to use my intuition. Every time I thought something was wrong, it was. I should have believed in myself more. But I chose to believe the lies because I was so desperate to be loved. There are some downfalls to moving home. Like gaining weight and falling back into old habits. But I learned to be strong for myself. No body can tell me what or how to do things. So I started my regular routine again, by myself. Got back to the gym, started eating healthier, and I started appreciating everything I have been given in life. When you start to show gratitude for everything, it’s great how quickly things start happening. I have two jobs and I am back in school. This time, I am doing it because I am worth it. I started this blog initially to blog my food experiences. I love food! Not because I love eating but because I love how food brings people together. Food carries down through generations and reminds people of comfort. What’s better than grandma’s homemade fudge!? Nothing. Nothing is better than mom’s signature dish that you ask for every holiday season. But then I started thinking, why stop at food?? I want to blog all of my wonderful experiences because I love life now. I love every opportunity I get and there’s so much more to life than sitting at home and being miserable! So follow me on this journey. Offer criticism to my posts, offer wisdom, and enjoy this crazy ride called life with me! 

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